an open letter to chocolate milk

Dear chocolate milk,

I don't know if you are aware of this, but you are delicious. If I could have only one drink for the rest of my life it would be you.

I know that your sugar content is higher than plain milk and drinking too much of you is bad for me, but I want you to know that I don't blame you. I wouldn't change you one bit. You are one of the most versatile beverages I know of. You can go with a meal, substitute a meal, or be a tasty snack. I know that we've had some rough patches in our relationship, like that week I decided to drink only water, but I've realized the error of my ways and I am sorry. You may have seen me in the past flirting with orange juice or even kool-aid but you need to know that they meant nothing to me. If it makes you feel better I was thinking about you the whole time I was with orange juice, and kool-aid tricked me into drinking it.

Finally I want to tell you something that I was debating bringing up. Last night I had a milkshake. It was a bad decision and I am sorry.

If you are wondering, I was safe, I used a straw but I still feel dirty. I am so sorry and if you will take me back I will be forever faithful.

Please forgive me.

sincerely,

-Paul